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Seething Cakes of Hatred

Making pancakes, as I learned at AP's birthday bash at the beach this weekend, is an unbelievably tedious chore. I don't know why I...

Saturday, February 13, 2010

Quinta Noval 1991

I've grown tired of saving this bottle of Port. I bought it over 10 years ago and planned on opening it with my ex on our 10th anniversary. We didn't make it that far. Close, but no cigar.

Next I decided that I would wait until I had found my true soulmate and we would open the aged bottle of port wine together someday. We would toast our love together and raise our glasses to our future.

I am my own valentine right now, so I opened the bottle and raised a glass to me last night. And you know what? I feel great. It was like a weight fell of my shoulders knowing I wasn't waiting around anymore for someone to come along.

Besides, if he shows up someday I can always order a better and older port wine online. Cheers!

Wednesday, February 10, 2010

Cultspeak

So, if you say to me, "Please join us for dinner at The Nice Restaurant next week. We're getting a big group together to celebrate my birthday! My whole family and lots of my friends are coming. My cousin and his wife will also be there."

What I hear, is this: "We are gathering together a large group of people who share no common bond other than their single-minded devotion to one person. We are going to overtake a restaurant and draw a great amount of attention to ourselves simply by sheer force of numbers."

Something to keep in mind.

Monday, February 01, 2010

Today is Monday

I am working at a call center and am reminded daily of my superior intelligence due to exchanges like this:

Customer: Is Churchill Downs' deposit window open today?
Me: Churchill Downs is open Wednesday - Sunday.
Customer: So they are not open today?
(Do I really have to answer this? I guess so. He is still waiting for me to respond.)
Me: Today is Monday, so, no.