Old News

I finally got around to seeing Brokeback Mountain this weekend, and I just have to say that they should have changed one line. Instead of "I wish I knew how to quit you," Jake should have said, "I wish I knew how to understand what you're saying." After seeing the movie, I finally understand all the fuss over Heath Ledger, but I got so frustrated watching the film that I started yelling at the television screen. I couldn't make out so many of the lines due to the fact that both lead actors mumbled throughout the entire movie. (The whispered muttering scene in the hotel room was infuriating!)

I know, I know. They are cowboys. They are tough. They are cool. But, come on. It is pretty sad when you have to rewind the last line of a movie five times so you can hear it. There I was with tears in my eyes shouting at Ennis, "What? What did you just say to Jack's shirt?! What did you SAY!?!?"

In the end, I gave up and googled it. ("Jack, I swear")

All in all, I enjoyed the movie. But now I agree with the decision to award the Oscar to Crash. I'm sorry to say it. I mean, I enjoy watching two men in love as much as the next guy (probably a little more than the next guy), but I just thought the performances in Crash were stronger, and the storylines were more complex and compelling. Plus, big bonus, I could understand the dialogue without closed captioning. Please don't revoke my gay card. I still think Dolly should have won an Academy Award for best original song.

I realize I am about a year behind in my Brokeback commentary. Reporting old news is what I do best. Here are some of my other hot topics:

1. That moon landing thing was pretty great, huh?

2. How about that Susan B. Anthony!? What a nut!!!

3. I think that Tiffany may just be the next Madonna.