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Monday, January 05, 2004

100 Things About Hot Toddy

Yes, if everybody else jumped off a bridge so would I, so shut up:

1. I was born at Baptist Memorial Hospital in Kansas City, Missouri

2. I was not, am not, and never will be a Baptist

3. My first word was 'cookie'

4. I was voted 'Most Likely to Succeed' by my sixth grade class.

5. Yes, I am well aware of the dubious nature of that honor.

6. I was hospitalized for juvenile rheumatoid arthritis when I was 12 and couldn't walk for a week.

7. When I was a kid someone told me I sounded like Marie Osmond when I sang.

8. I took it as a compliment.

9. I tasted alligator and gazelle at a restaurant in Kenya

10. I studied Swedish for two years in Washington, DC

11. My favorite color is purple.

12. I thought I was of Polish descent for many years.

13. I learned I was of Ukrainian descent when my grandfather changed his story during my adolescence

14. I learned that I was actually of German descent when my mother informed me my grandfather adopted my dad.

15. I was told not to let my father know I had learned of his adoption.

16. My father told my 10 year-old nephew before he told me.

17. I cry when I watch Candid Camera.

18. My parents have been divorced (from each other) two times.

19. My parents have married each other three times.

20. I have one sister, and she's five years younger than I am.

21. My sister figured out I was gay before anybody else in my family.

22. My father met Anita Bryant and had his picture taken with her while he was in the Air Force.

23. I came out to my father in 1996.

24. I broke my front tooth playing Duck, Duck, Goose.

25. I was a freshman in college when it happened.

26. My body fat has decreased by 27 percent since 2000.

27. I've gained over 60 pounds of muscle since 2000.

28. My ex-boyfriend said I was a "wine snob" because I don't like White Zinfandel.

29. When I was in third grade I dressed up as my mother for Halloween.

30. My mom tried, unsuccessfully, to talk me out of it.

31. My dad was out of town.

32. I came out to my mother in 2001.

33. I was crushed against a fence by a cow at a petting zoo when was a kid.

34. I was trying to hug her.

35. My biggest fear is regretting missed opportunities.

36. I graduated magna cum laude from Asbury College.

37. The lowest grade I received in college was a C for Lifeguard Training

38. I don't kill spiders even when they get in the house.

39. I met Shirley Jones at a Salvation Army Advisory Board dinner in Washington, DC.

40. I own every video in the Time-Life "Little House on the Prairie" collection.

41. I planned on being a missionary after college.

42. My missionary assignment was going to be Paris, France.

43. I withdrew my application after I joined a cult.

44. As a child I loved the ocean but had to be carried into the water because I refused to walk on the sand.

45. The first time I had a crush on a teacher was in fourth grade.

46. My fourth grade teacher was Mr. Cramer.

47. I still remember his height and weight from the day he mentioned it in class.

48. He was 5'9" and weighed 180 pounds.

49. The first boy who ever kissed me was named Kody and was dressed as a cowboy for Halloween.

50. I was 28.

51. I failed Algebra in 11th grade.

52. I received an academic honors award from the principal the same day I failed Algebra.

53. I can quote the entire "fill it to the rim" Brim commercial from memory

54. I wasn't allowed to watch Laverne & Shirley when my father was home because they "screamed" too much.

55. I put ketchup on macaroni and cheese.

56. I put ketchup on corn.

57. I put ketchup on pizza.

58. I have ketchup packets in my car for "emergencies"

59. I hate lima beans.

60. I hate cantaloupe.

61. In the first nine years after college I had 23 different employers.

62. I have a strange phobia - I am scared of telephone busy signals.

63. I'm really not afraid of busy signals, but I think that would be a really interesting phobia to have, don't you?

64. My favorite cereal box prize was a Bobby Sherman record I cut out of the back of an Alpha Bits box.

65. The first book I ever read by myself was Go, Dog, Go.

66. My first acting role was in Sleeping Beauty 3000 at Ft. Lauderdale Children's Theatre.

67. I was called to the principal's office my senior year in high school for "stage fighting" in a parking lot.

68. I had to write an apology to the school board.

69. I was put into a learning disabilities program in first grade because I wrote some of my letters backwards.

70. I was placed in a gifted students program in sixth grade.

71. I wanted to be a dentist when I was younger.

72. My plans changed when I realized I had to put my hands in other people's mouths.

73. I hadn't thought of it, really.

74. Until I was in high school I thought that milk was cow urine.

75. I loved drinking milk in spite of my misconception.

76. A guy once offered me money to pee on him.

77. I didn't do it.

78. I had a crush on John Schneider (Duke of Hazzard) when I was a kid.

79. I played baritone and tuba in my high school marching band

80. My first live concert was Amy Grant

81. I like country line dancing

82. My favorite drink is a Maker's Mark straight up

83. I lived in Washington, DC (Dupont Circle) in the early 90s.

84. I was in the closet in the early 90s.

85. I love singing karaoke

86. I ended a seven-year relationship on my 36th birthday.

87. I used to pretend I was on a cooking show and talk to the audience when I made sandwiches as a kid.

88. My sister had an imaginary enemy, Sheila, instead of an imaginary friend.

89. My father built a stage for me in the basement when I was 14.

90. I am a Libra.

91. I had a relationship with a man who lied to me about his HIV status.

92. I am HIV negative and, thankfully, did not put myself at risk with the person who was lying to me.

93. I got yelled at during high school graduation practice by the principal.

94. I was dancing down the aisle of the church.

95. Wearing socks to class was mandatory at my college.

96. I love animals so much it makes me cry sometimes.

97. I once dreamed I was dating Matthew Perry and woke up missing him.

98. I am a member of a sketch comedy group called "The Exotic Actors Guild"

99. My favorite instrument is the cello.

100. My friends mean everything to me.


Anonymous said...

What a marvelous blog! I shall read it daily from now on.

Anonymous said...

Ok Toddy, I'm not really your sister....only in spirit... and er a Name.....and oh several other 'lil commonalities I see we do or have shared. "For Instance?", you say. I say, "O.K., here goes!"
1. Kansas City
2. Babtist (whatever, whatever)
3. Arthritis at age 12
4. Sounding/Looking like Marie.
5. Taking a dissss as a complement:
(I was introduced as"My Friend Who was Built to Breed!") duhhhhh!!!!!!!!
6. Polish descent thought! Could it of stemmed from your Dad talking about the way you did things???? """Watch, watch, watch how Toddy does this.....Just like a Polock!! I tell ya!!!"
7. Was solicited for my pee too.
8. Didn't do it either, at that point in time I didn't have a clue 2 what hungry really was. Where is he now?????
9. I have one sister. Small amends for the 5 brothers.
10. I -HAD- Missionary goals at one time to... for my wedding night! (HA-HA, Rotting skeleton frame still on that park bench...Waiting for Mr. Right!)
11. German descent( with a 'lil Irish((Shoemaker)), and Indian tossed in for a drunken, scalping of a brawlatious time!)
12.You mean no matter how long or hard I suck & succle this thing I still won't get any milk out of it?????
13. Dubious Nature
14. Ketchup
15.etc, etc, gtg, b warned, I'll be back!!!!

Anonymous said...

Your 100 list is a hoot! I want you to be my new best friend! Keep up the great blog!!!!


Anonymous said...

You attended Asbury College? In Wilmore?
Oh, lordy!

Did you spin around 3 times everytime you entered or left town? If so, did you face the water tower with the giant electric cross on it?

You've had an interesting life.

Anonymous said...

okay, I am freaking out--the "fill to the rim, with brim" was my commercial! I loved that commercial "this is brim?" the best part is the laughter at the end!
I did the commercials in front of the mirror and everytime I did just about anything--hence the constant dialogue in the head thing...

Jaimée said...

I enjoy that 4 of your facts have cows in them..or cow urine as you thought :)

Why might I notice this? I was knocked over by a cow when I was younger, I was also trying to hug it.

Jaimee (Ytana)