Yum Yum Brotherhood Road Trip

If anybody has been to Vancouver, BC and has suggestions for lodging for nine gay boys, let me know.

The Yum Yum Brotherhood is heading to Vancouver, BC this spring. The Yum Yums are hoping for a journey reminiscent of Priscilla, Queen of the Desert. I'm just hoping someone else will volunteer to stand on top of the motor home with flowing garments. I'll stay inside the vehicle and make out with Guy Pearce.

Each Yum Yum is responsible for planning or researching one aspect of our trip. I can't remember what my job was supposed to be, so I have decided to simply provide commentary on everyone else's work.

One of the places we are evaluating for accommodations is The Park Ridge. I must admit that I am intrigued by the "causal ambiance" described on their web site, but am very curious as to what, exactly, the ambiance will cause.

The Park Ridge features a restaurant within walking distance that boasts such famous dinner guests as Boris Yeltzen and Bill Clinton. It is really important that I stay somewhere NEAR a restaurant where Boris Yeltzen (isn't it Yeltsin?) and Bill Clinton ate dinner. That is a big plus.

Final Grade: A+ There is a floating drink tray in the hot tub. This place rocks.

I ruled out several other hotels and inns due to some unfortunate spelling errors, such as the one that claimed to have rooms "availible".

The English Bay Inn seems promising. The only spelling error on their site was a comma omission (queensized beds). I guess I can live with it.

However, there may be a problem with Hobbits. The owner's name is Boban. He has to be a Hobbit, don't you think? Nothing creeps me out more than little power hungry Hobbits running around trying to serve me tea. The site also references a Chippendale style dining room, which sounds hot. I don't know if we're required to tip the dancers, but if we're not then I would totally be into it.

All the rooms have ensuite bathrooms. Sounds classy. The inn even brags about the "crisp Ralph Lauren linens". Now that's just gross. I don't mind if my linens are crispy when I get out of bed, but I can't deal with having Ralph's crisp all over my sheets before I even climb into them.

Final Grade: A- The English Bay Inn seems like somewhere Boris Yeltzen/Yeltsin may eat near.

I would love to have some suggestions for spelling error-free lodging, so let me know if you have a recommendation!