First Kiss

Today is the anniversary of my first kiss. Well, my first boy kiss.

I was living in Dallas, Texas and spending lots of time at a country/western gay bar called The Round Up. I had only been out of the closet for a couple months. One Tuesday night before Halloween, I ventured down to Cedar Springs by myself. I didn't realize everyone would be in costume, which is a stupid oversight considering Halloween is, like, Gay Christmas. Of course everyone would be celebrating all week. Stupid me.

I passed a table at the bar when Joan Crawford shouted at me to come sit with her and a handsome cowboy dressed in black. Joan Crawford was carrying a wire hanger and had cold creamed smeared on his face. The cowboy was silent and adorable. His body was muscular and tight. His features were angular, and his eyes were blue. His name was Kody.

We chatted for a while, and I found out Kody was Joan Crawford's date. So, when they decided to head out and hit the next bar on their agenda, I bid them both good night. Kody grabbed my hand and pulled me after them. He squeezed my hand tight as the three of us walked to the door.

At the next bar, Kody started telling me how he was tired of dating older guys. He was 19. I sort of accidentally didn't tell him I was actually 29. I have always looked about 8-10 years younger than I am. So, technically, I could have been 19, right?

Anyway, Kody and I went to the bathroom together and left Joan Crawford sitting at the bar with her wire hanger. As we were leaving the bathroom, he pushed me up against the wall. Then Kody removed his black cowboy hat and covered our faces with it as he kissed me. I had never kissed a boy, and it was heaven. I could feel him pushing against me as we kissed. My favorite thing about kissing Kody was that he would pull my tongue into his mouth by sucking. It hurt a little bit, because he was so enthusiastic about it. But it was a good kind of pain.

After the kiss, I confessed to Kody that I was 29. But he still called me the next day. We met by a lake in Dallas and made out by the water. Then we spent another two hours at my place. We took off ours shirts and jeans and made out as we listened to an Enigma CD. But I was too nervous to do anything more.

Kody and I did eventually sleep together. We took it slowly. I think it was a WHOLE WEEK before we slept together, which is an eternity in gay time. We had a very sexual relationship for about a month, and then we broke up. I broke up with him on the patio of The Village Station. Incidentally, that same patio is where I had my first kiss with CT, who I stayed with for 7 years.

Kody really was too young for me and I soon realized he was not ready for anything more than sex. I dated only a couple more guys before I entered into the relationship with CT. The obsession with the cowboy dressed in black dissipated, and I almost forgot about him.

But, damn, that boy could kiss. I know I won't forget that.