The Rest of This Week

I have to tell you that I have no idea what I will be popping in the Toaster Oven for the rest of the week. See, my birthday is Friday, and I am celebrating all week. I know I am spending my actual birthday in Seattle and may audio blog. If you think you might like to meet me in Seattle for happy hour, even if you live in New York City, St. Louis or Cleveland, please e-mail me. I will come heavily armed and with several friends so do not attempt to plan an abduction, though, because you will not succeed unless I decide I want you to.

So, I might audio blog Friday. And maybe Saturday I will audio blog too, or I might not. This week I am doing whatever I want or whatever Pony tells me to do.

I might just do lists of silly things such as this one:

Two Things I Thought of Today:
(by Hot Toddy)
(like I have to put my name there - it's my blog - who do you think wrote this list?)
(Anyway)

1. I hate routine and will complain about it loudly. This morning I got really frustrated and shouted from the kitchen, "I HATE ROUTINE!!!", so The Handsome Prince came to see what I was yelling about. "Why do you hate routine, Hot Toddy's Toaster Oven," he asked. I explained to him (after trying to get him to stop calling me Hot Toddy's Toaster Oven) that the catalyst for my outburst was that I had to pour coffee into my commuter mug - which I do every morning. Every single damn morning. For some reason this predictable and mundane action made me snap this morning, so I yelled.

2. I don't know why, but after I take my vitamins , I always burp about 20 minutes afterwards. It is sort of irritating.

Do you see what you're in for this week? Random, ridiculous thoughts. Not at all the orderly relevant insight you've come to expect from HTTO.

This, for example, is something random and ridiculous that I played with today. It made me laugh.

Oh, what else. Let's see. Vomitola is a tapestry of nonsense sometimes. Especially today. Go see for yourself.

I was about to link you to another person who I feel is very entertaining and random, but then I decided he might be a better writer than I am and use less run-on sentences than I do and that you would maybe decide to read him instead of the Toaster Oven, so I thought better of putting his link on here. But I'll give you a hint. His name is Jerry. He is funny, and undpredictable. His blog title ends in a question mark.

Oh, for Pete's sake. Here you go. Just don't like him better than you like me.

If you are thinking of buying me any of the following items for my birthday, I appreciate the thought but I do NOT need these things:

1. Hunts Ketchup -
Auburn Pisces bought me a bottle of "the other ketchup" because of the shape. Kind of looks like a woman's hourglass figure. While I enjoy the ketchup she gave me and do use it at work, please remember that, for me, Heinz=good, Hunts=mediocre

2. Lube
I already have an extra-large pump bottle that I am using as fast as I can

3. The Holy Bible
I already read it once. Probably won't need to re-read it. I got the gist.

4. Television set.
We have three in the house already. Or is it four?

Those are four things you shouldn't buy me for my b'naibrithday. I mean birthday.
Thanks.

Good luck reading my blog this week. I feel for you. I really do.