The Easiest Thing in the World
Most mornings, The Handsome Prince rides downtown with me to go to work. He is a bigshot staff member at Portland's leading professional theater company that has never cast me in anything. Whatever.
Anyway, yesterday morning THP told me he was going to make us homemade pizza for dinner. One thing I love about him is that the simplest exchange becomes blogworthy. It makes my life so much easier...
THP: Hot Toddy, I am going to make us pizza for dinner.
HT: Yay! I don't have to cook. I am so tired of boiling water for mac and cheese.
THP: I have to go to the store after work and buy yeast.
HT: Yeast? For what?
THP: For the crust.
HT: (Nearly crashing into a phone pole as he swerves in shock) Crust!!? You can make crust?!
THP: Todd, making crust is the easiest thing in the world.
HT: No it isn't. Masturbating is the easiest thing in the world.
THP: Depends on how drunk you are.
HT: And how good the porn is.
THP: And how long it has been since the last time you did it.
THP: Anyway.... you only need four ingredients - -
HT: For masturbation? Let's see... a hand, some lube, an erection and...what's the fourth? Oh, porn!
THP: No, I am talking about making crust.
HT: So am I, sort of.
Anybody wanna come over for pizza?
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