Good Enough

It's no secret that I think The Rock is one of the most gorgeous men on the planet. He is nearly perfect. He is beautiful. But this weekend, while waiting to get my haircut, I flipped through a celebrity gossip magazine and found out, to my horror, that my fantasy man recently had liposuction .

The quest for the perfect body is already difficult enough without hunky men raising the bar even higher. Why wasn't The Rock happy with his beautiful body? It just amazes me that he could find fault with his appearance.

I've been doing a really good job getting to the gym regularly. This morning I could feel that my muscles are tighter, and I'm feeling stronger and healthier. But I wonder why I bother. Is it worth all those squats and biceps curls if even The Rock feels he needs lipo?

It makes me feel bad for him. People like me who drool over the hot guys are partially to blame. The reason he is so popular is because he looks so good. Naturally, there is a pressure to maintain his muscular physique. Otherwise, what would happen to his fame?

I recently admitted to a friend that I feel sort of ashamed of the fact that I have always dated really attractive men. I almost feel like some of them were "trophies". I worry that I'm shallow for always going after the hot guys. I know that physical attraction is really important in a relationship, but do I really need to date men with model good looks? I worry that I don't look inside their hearts the way I should. I don't know how to remedy this, either.

Should I purposely seek out someone at the bar who doesn't seem attractive to me? Should I start giving my number to men who don't turn me on? How do I balance my Libra tendencies towards aesthetic beauty with my desire for a relationship with someone who is beautiful inside?

I'm also questioning my own motives for self-improvement. I know that I feel so much better when I work out, but I would be lying if I said that's the only reason I go to the gym. I want a smaller waist and bigger muscles. I want to turn heads. And I feel so shallow for wanting those things.

Maybe I can find a balance somehow. Today when I go to the gym, I'm going to have a moment of silence for The Rock. He was fine the way he was - more than fine, actually. But he didn't think he was good enough.

After my moment of reflection, I'm going to lift hard and work towards the physique I desire. I'm not ready to give up yet, even if the bar keeps raising. I just want to have the best body I can, but I refuse to look at myself in the mirror and say, "that's not good enough".